Raising Kids

 What did you learn from your father?

When you think about your father, what are some of the good things that come to your mind? What are some lasting lessons he has taught you that you believe will be valuable to pass on to your children?

 Your son already has the advantage of having a believing father. However, this places the responsibility on your personal and spiritual leadership. You know that raising children is a joint responsibility between you and your wife. However, it seems that the Bible places a heavy burden on you as a parent. Paul told the believing parents in Ephesus the following: in Ephesians 6: 4: in Ephesians 6: 4 Parents, do not anger your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

If I could please your father

What would you say if you had a chance to thank your father for what he taught you? In other words, these are the reasons you want your child to say thanks. And if you are like me, I would like your boys to thank you for the spiritual contribution you made too.

So what would you like your God-given child to thank you for? OR, in other words, At age 18, how do you want your child to thank you?

(let him answer)

I believe we can summarize their wishes in three aspects that everyone wants their children to say.

Dad, you helped me get

wisdom/knowledge

Peace

Happiness

When these three aspects are achieved, they will bring us a successful life.

Wisdom is seeing life from God’s point of view. Knowledge helps us know ourselves, others, and God in a way that encourages happiness and peace and leads to success with all three.

Proverbs was written over a long period and is a collection of sayings about being a good person and avoiding bad people and bad habits and choices. Especially chapters 1 through 7 highlights a phrase used 24 times in the book and 16 times in these seven chapters. That phrase is: “My son.”

Solomon was the wisest man in history. However, he wasn’t such a good father. His words are Spirit-inspired instructions to parents. They will help us when we read them, meditate on them, and dedicate ourselves to living and teaching them.

I will read some of the texts from “My son” and exchange them for context and learning. Example

1: 8 My son, listen to your father’s instructions. - reverse this sentence would be

1: 8, father, instruct your son.

So, father, how do we instruct?

We must realize that our instruction starts early.

I learned that you start teaching earlier in life, whether you know it or not, because your kids always watch you. The sooner you realize this, the better because later on, teenagers don’t listen as well either.

instruct often

Use every opportunity to teach your boys and girls about God. To do this, you need to know God intimately. You must be a child of God.

In Proverbs 1, Solomon starts at the beginning, which is always a good plan.

Proverbs 1: 1 The proverbs of Solomon the son of David king of Israel, 2 to learn wisdom and teaching; to understand as words of intelligence; 3 to obtain the teaching of good behaviour, justice, judgment and equity; 4 To give prudence to the simple and knowledge and discernment to the young. 5 Let the wise hear and grow in prudence; and that the learned acquire the ability 6 to understand proverbs and parables, as well as the words and riddles of the wise. 7 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and teaching.

Verse 7 says: The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.

What brings wisdom, peace and happiness?

Solomon immediately tells us what we need to do to have true wisdom, peace and happiness, the fear of the LORD. However, he also put us on the alert for two types of people who will appear many times in this practical book. First the sage and then the fool.

 Application

Share this advice with your kids.

We need to share this divine information with our children, not pointing to a specific family member or neighbour but sharing how the two reveal themselves. Here it is interesting that Solomon says that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge. Later he will also say that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.

What is the difference between knowledge and wisdom?

Knowledge is something we learn at school or through life experiences.

Wisdom is what we learn by going through the Scriptures and knowing more about God, and relating that knowledge to daily experiences. He also knows how to apply knowledge and the Word to every situation.

Therefore, both wisdom and knowledge need to be filtered through the lens of the scriptures. And while

In the child, this word comes from the father and mother.

Then Solomon says we must listen. (8)

Proverbs 1: 8 Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction, and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.

Here he tells us that we, like children, need to pay attention to both mother and father! Here too, he tells us as parents that we need to have something to say. We need to know how to respond to the questions and situations that happen every day. We need to be prepared with wise and godly answers. These answers will become easier as we spend more time in God’s Word.

Listening as a child and as a young person

Listening is often problematic. When we are children, we believe every word that comes out of our parents’ mouths. As we grow, not so much. This is where children make mistakes and need correction. We parents need to use wisdom when talking to our children. Children believe that their parents, especially the father, know everything.

However, as children grow up, they realize that their parents are fallible. They make mistakes. They are not perfect. Our children must know that we are willing to admit that we made a mistake when we make a mistake. This attitude is not a sign of weakness but of strength.

When we admit that we are flawed and want an honest and open relationship with our children, they will listen.

However, we must remember that we are their parents, and they are our children. Therefore, we must lead and expect them to follow, and we will not always be seen as their friends. In reality, we are more than our children’s friends; we are your parents. We are God-given leaders who will help you know God.

We can and must help our children to choose good friends.

And Solomon gives us instructions on how to guide our children in verses 10-33, Solomon says:

don’t go with the wrong people

Listen and follow wisdom.

Nowadays, it’s easy to find bad people. Doesn’t it seem stupid to want to hang out with the wrong people? However, the human tendency is to do evil and hang out with the wrong people. We are sinners, don’t forget that when you look into your child’s eyes. He may look like an angel, but it doesn’t take long for him to let you know he’s not. We are sinners by nature, as Paul mentions in Romans 3:23.

Our task as parents is to constantly alert our children to this danger. So, finally, let’s look at several verses that we can use to help us have lovely, happy children who experience peace in life.

Proverbs 3:11 My son, do not reject the discipline of the Lord, nor be angry at his rebuke.

Proverbs 4:10 My son, listen and accept my words, and his years of life will increase.

Proverbs 4:20 My son, listen to my words; pay attention to my teachings.

Proverbs 5:1 My son, pay attention to my wisdom; incline your ears to my intelligence,

Proverbs 5:7 And now, my son, hear what I say and do not turn from the words of my mouth.

Proverbs 24:21 My son, fear the LORD and the king; don’t mess with the rebels,

Proverbs 6:20 My son, keep your father’s command and do not forsake your mother’s instruction.

Proverbs 7:1 My son, keep my words and keep my commandments in your heart.

Conclusion

As parents and parents-to-be, and even grandparents, we are tasked with showing God, and God’s ways, to our children. We have no guarantee that they will follow our instructions. We see this in the lives of Solomon, Samuel and Aaron. We don’t control the future, but we can prepare our children to walk God’s way.